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Heartwings Love Notes 1017 - My New Year's Resolution

Heartwings says, "Listening when speaking can be very important."

After claiming I wasn't going to make any resolutions, I did make just one. When I thought it up, it seemed like a good idea, one that will be different from the usual ones made at New Year's. Because of the nature of this resolution, it will not be forgotten, as many are, in a few weeks or so. It's a simple resolution. It does not require me to give up anything, or even to take on anything. It utilizes something I do normally, anyway: being mindful. As well it will benefit others as well as myself, which is a big plus.

My resolution is simply this: to speak less and to listen more. As I encourage myself to pay attention to my behavior, it is simple for me to notice when, for instance, I am interrupting people before they have finished speaking. I have done this since I was a small child. As I've grown older, I've managed to curb this behavior somewhat, yet not entirely. I still have a way to go, hence the resolution. However, my resolution is not just about interrupting people, it is also about listening to myself and monitoring what I am going to say.

I remember years ago reading about a woman who was well loved by all. Someone asked her for the secret of her success, and she replied, "before I speak, I try to stop and taste the words before they come out." I'm applying this principle to my speech. Ideally, if the words I'm going to say are pleasant, helpful, and/or kind, I will let them be said. If they are biting, critical, or sarcastic, I will change them. Of course, this is if I succeed in my efforts to hear them ahead of time.

I am not always able to be mindful. That is a goal, not necessarily an given. Still, making the effort is what's important. Success is something to be grateful for. For many years I was all too often prone to blurting. I remember one friend telling me I had (unbeknownst to me) been highly critical of her about something, and she was kind enough to call me on it rather than distance herself from the friendship. No doubt there are others in my past who were not as kind, and that I alienated unwittingly with my careless tongue. I think it has been called foot in mouth disease.

For me the living of my life is at best a learning process, whereby I can experience the results of my actions and then decide what I wish to continue doing and what I wish to change or do over. I make the attempt to be aware of my actions and my intentions, so that I keep myself in right relationship with my two most important personal principles: practice gratitude for everything, and do unto others as you would have them do unto you if you were they. It's vital to remember that not everyone thinks as I do, and to act accordingly.

May your resolutions be of help to you if you make them.

Got any easy recipes to share? Food stories to tell? I so appreciate your comments and thoughts. Please write to me at tashahal@aol.com, and for more love notes, check out www.heartwingsandfriends.com. Thanks!
 

I love to hear from readers and would be honored if you would comment and let me know any suggestions or thoughts. If a friend sent you this, you can sign up at my web site, www.heartwingslovenotes.com, where more love notes can be found in the archives.

Blessings and Best Regards,
Tasha Halpert
 

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